Where do I start with this one? Before the Xbox released and took the world by storm (thanks to Halo: Combat Evolved), everyone pretty much considered the console dead on arrival. Microsoft struggled to gain Japanese support for their overweight machine (it's a glandular problem, I swear!). Sure, the Xbox would eventually gain some pretty awesome support from both SEGA and Tecmo, with Capcom, Konami, and Namco lending a hand here and there. But for every one of the good games, there was a terrible counterpart, and in some cases, a very bizarre one.
Enter N.U.D.E. A game designed to appeal to the Japanese audiences who couldn't give two shits about Microsoft's console (and still don't); now, I understand that every culture has different ideas of "appeal" that are exclusive and varied, but this game is just plain weird. You play a product tester who has been tasked with interacting with and teaching a female robot how to perform all sorts of mundane tasks, all the while trying to ignore the nagging portion of your brain that tells you she looks underage and that Chris Hansen will ask you to sit in a fucked up kitchen at any given moment. You have a headset and you chat with her, and she is supposed to learn. I understand where the developers were going with this in a sense: it's less of a game and more of a simulation, but what I find the oddest is the subject used. Why is the robot female? Why couldn't it just be a genderless android? Why does she look like she's twelve and needs you to command her? How many people actually got off to playing this game? All questions that we will probably never know the answer to.
Not surprisingly, the game never saw a North American or European release, but if you manage to snag a copy then be very thankful: apparently, the game sells on eBay for up to $150 plus shipping. Which brings about yet another question: who in the fuck is spending $150 to play this game?
Mind. Blown.
Okay, now imagine the exact same concept as above, but instead of an underaged-looking female robot you are now task with taking care of a fish with a man's face attached to it. That, ladies and gentlemen, is Seaman for the Dreamcast. Mind you, the game was an experience when it released and it was pretty interesting to see how gaming technology was advancing, but it doesn't make it any less odd because of that. Not only are you tasked with raising the Seaman through its many life stages, but what's more is that he interacts with you in all kinds of ways, including making rude and snide comments toward you, insulting you, and using trivia. What's even more bizarre is that, as mentioned, he "evolves" and you can also breed Seaman together.
Amazing game, bizarre idea. I would have loved to have been there during the meeting where SEGA approved Seaman for development, then again for release outside of Japan. Oh, to be a fly on that wall (with a human face)!
Probably the most popular bizarre game ever made. Katamari Damacy has a really strong following: so much so that sequels were released in North America on multiple platforms and all of them sold well. The gist of the game is this: you play as a protagonist whose job is to recreate the stars that have disappeared out of the sky above...by rolling all kinds of shit into an enormous ball that will eventually become a celestial body. That's right, everything you see, you roll it up: from forks, to tables, to people, to cars, to trucks, to airplanes, etc. You usually start off small and as you add more and more items, your Katamari grows, and every time it grows into a new size, you can pick up even more items that you couldn't previously stick to the mass of things rolling in front of you.
The game itself is actually a ton of fun: ridiculous, over the top, homoerotic fun. The gameplay is addicting to a point where even the shit graphics are forgivable. Maybe it's the obsessive-compulsive part of me, but there is a satisfaction that I draw from rolling things together and cleaning up the world.
Odd to its very core, but also very good.
Hold up, wait a minute, let me put my booty in it!
*Several minutes later*
Sorry about that. Needed some time to wrap my head around this one. Technically, it's the entire series and not just one entry that I'm referencing, but it doesn't really change much. Cho Aniki is a 2D side-scroller shoot-em-up in the same vain as Ikaruga or Sin and Punishment. What makes it different? Your avatar is a half naked guy who shoots "lasers" and fights other half naked guys who also shoot "lasers." Everything about this game is homoerotic. From the characters to the bosses who fire attacks at you by cumming on you or hitting you with their man-shaped penises from behind a thinly veiled attempt to cover up private parts. Don't believe me?
Yeah, that's a guy coming out of his pants and stretching toward you.
Again...who is the target audience? I'm not sure of what to think of this one. It's more confusing than Stephenie Meyer's success with the Twilight series.
This isn't a full blown game like all the previous ones, but it wins because it's so insanely out of left field that it even puts Cho Aniki to shame. The premise of the game: you are a bodybuilder who is out to save the world...erm...to save your friend's stolen protein powder. Your job is to chase the thief across three levels by breaking through walls and posing bodybuilder style so that you don't hit said walls face first. The best (worst?) part is that you get to pick from a slew of ridiculously camp characters that defy definition.
Seriously: who comes up with this shit? Who was the head of the meeting where this game was decided upon? I would have given it the green light as a massive inside joke, but as a serious project? I would have been dubious. Ultimately, I'm just not sure of who this game is supposed to appeal to...straight guys? Not likely. Gay guys? I have no interest in this game. Girls? Why would they care? Children? Senior citizens? Small cottages? Fire hydrants? I'm at a loss as to what Namco was trying to achieve here.
...and just because Japan isn't the only country to make bizarre video games, I present to you "Custer's Revenge." Custer's Revenge is a pornographic, "adult" game in which the player takes the role of General Custer. The task? Reach the other side of the screen where you get to rape a tied up Native American woman. That's it. That's the whole game. What's worse is that it was rendered on the Atari 2600, where a pair of pixels in a line were supposed to represent an erection. The graphics were awful even for their time, the idea was ridiculous, and the gameplay itself was just plain botched. This one of the strangest, most notorious games ever made, and the reasons are pretty obvious...
- Kharlo -
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